When television was in its infancy in the 1950’s, a show never to be missed was The Honeymooners. I was a young child and recall the show to this day. However, in comparison to today’s sophistication and political correctness, I wonder how it achieved such popularity. Don’t say nostalgia, as if THAT can erase all past evil and chalk it up to, “It was an acceptable form of treatment between couples back then.” When we apply what we know about domestic violence and intimate partner violence today, we should be horrified, shocked and dismayed at the treatment of women in the 1950’s and the wife as slave and one to be abused, as portrayed in this classic comedy which all family members laughed at and looked forward to each week!
Yes, I can take a joke about things that are truly funny. A review of many YouTube episodes of The Honeymooners revealed some funny stuff between Jackie Gleason and his sidekick, Art Carney. However, the married couple’s relationship can be viewed as questionable, and in some circles, abusive. My opinion is such shows give evil people evil ideas.
The character of Ralph Kramden is a know-it-all bus driver, who gets involved in one get rich quick scheme after another and who loves to dominate and bully his wife. In fact, it appears that his friendship with best friend Norton is far more intimate regarding personal closeness and compatibility than with his wife, Alice, the begrudging housewife who serves “the master.”
Alice Kramden is your typical ‘50’s housewife, BUT, she is no pushover. She frequently stands up to her husband’s verbal, physical and psychological abuse. Writers for Wikipedia attempt to explain away his bad behavior by saying, “Ralph is very short-tempered, frequently resorting to bellowing insults and hollow threats.” Hidden beneath the many layers of bluster, however, is “a soft-hearted man who loves his wife and is devoted to his best pal, Ed Norton.” How can we be so sure of this? We have a very insecure male who is barely scraping by to provide a living for his wife who is not at all ambitious, with the exception of lifting a fork. His world revolves around bowling and he doesn’t appear to care about bettering his situation in real meaningful ways. And so, he finds fault with everyone else.
How often has the character of Alice been frustrated, angry, in tears or wanted to run away from her apartment prison? Although we may not have seen blatant physical abuse, there was plenty of physical gesturing/threats, pounding on or throwing inanimate objects, screaming and verbal threats.
Ralph’s mother in law constantly reminds him of his weight and that he is a bad provider to her daughter. The character of Alice apparently studied to be a secretary prior to marrying Ralph, and according to the storyline, she was one of 12 children with a father who never worked. Talk about lost dreams for these two characters caught up in the life within a Brooklyn tenement. This series was supposed to mirror the working class of the 1950’s, but, were the innocent 1950’s really so bad? Was the working class so angry?
It appears to me, that current life is a lot more complicated, with far more sources of anger upon which abusers can blame their unacceptable behavior.
Historically, the start of The Honeymooners began as a six-minute sketch on the DuMont Television Network and then as one of the featured sketches beginning in 1953 on the Jackie Gleason Show (a variety/comedy hour) moving to the CBS Network. The Gleason show was a rival for the ever popular, I Love Lucy show.
The other two characters of The Honeymooners included Ed Norton, skillfully portrayed by Art Carney, and his wife, Trixie, a rather nebulous person, portrayed by Joyce Randolph, a relatively minor role who was Alice’s best friend. Ed Norton was your average Joe working in the New York City sewer system. He was goofy, yet affable and loyal to a fault to his friend, Ralph. Although his character supposedly went to typing school, he didn’t like contained spaces. Norton was proud to describe his job as, “A sub-supervisor in the subdivision of the department of subterranean sanitation. I just keep things moving.”
Back to Intimate Partner Violence… Is Ralph Kramden an Abuser?
I reviewed about a dozen episodes of the Honeymooners on YouTube. Although the viewer can make the case that Alice was very capable of giving it back to Ralph with biting sarcasm, what would be the consequence if she had not stood up for herself? Would Ralph eventually follow through with his gesture “to the Moon, Alice!” and make contact?
On the other hand, being submissive and following an intimate partner’s demands to the letter in no way shape or form guarantees safety. So what’s a woman to do? Anger and jealousy over perceived infractions will often continue to fuel the partner’s behavior. Alice does not have to do anything wrong in the eyes of the world. What Ralph perceives and does is what matters in the end with such toxic relationships.
A Few Examples of Ralph’s Verbal Abuse from Episodes of “The Honeymooners”
“Alice, you’re a riot…. I’d like to… (Waving fist); Boys and Girls Together episode;
“Just be careful Alice, Be careful… The life you save may be your own”; A Women’s Work is Never Done episode;
“Oh Boy, are you ‘gonna get yours… Just once… Pow” Peacemaker episode;
(Talking about not washing his bowling shirt or darning his socks) “… I’m gonna put in a new system right now. When I come home, if it isn’t done the way I say, you get one demerit. Do you know what happens to you when you get ten demerits…? A Woman’s Work is Never Done episode
Smart woman!!! She protected her financial interests and was a pioneer career woman too! Ralph would have been so jealous!
Please go to http://www.documenttheabuse.com/. It may help you… It will certainly help someone you know!
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