Blossoming Into A Love Story…
A Perspective on Relationships-
As we pass through the stages of life, from childhood to teenagers to young adult and adult maturity we meet many people along our path…
Some of the paths to relationships, whether they be family or friends, intersect, take parallel paths or, for whatever reason, may seemingly be lost forever.
Speaking in generalities, the LGBTQ+ community throughout history has banned together as a tight community out of necessity.
Oppression, abuse, homicide, hostility and hatred creates close bonds among those who just want to live their lives and not be judged’
Acceptance or rejection can appear to ‘run in cycles’. This is directly influenced by political, cultural, ethnic , religious and generational factors.
However, in recent years, we have seen a resurgence of deep seated hatred, particularly against Jews, Muslims, the transgendered community etc.
This begs the question, have we really progressed at all from the days of Stonewall or the “Whites Only” lunch counters of the South in the 60s prior to the Civil Rights Act of 1964? I really wonder?
My Journey into the LGBTQ+ World
When I accepted my true orientation later in my 30’s,, initially it was like a terrifying light bulb suddenly turning on. . However, as time progressed, I found my niche and my stride in the LGBTQ+ communities in Hartford and New Haven Connecticut.
Along the way, I met many friends who both guided me and inspired me to make contributions of my own. I helped with events and attended the Hartford Gay & Lesbian Film Festival at Trinity College; (“Out Film Connecticut”) -Established in 1988; I attended dances/ performances at the Hartford Gay and Lesbian Center ( Health Collective next door;)
I joined PFLAG Hartford and became an active member.
I also assisted and attended several of the True Colors National LGBTQ+ Youth Conferences of its kind in the Country that existed in the initial full conference format for 25 years with SW Founder, Robin McHaelen.
(Now part of the State of Connecticut Department of Children and Families).
I also joined ‘Another Octave’ Connecticut Gay Women’s Chorus, based in Hamden, CT ,performing and touring within Connecticut and even performed in a week-long International Conference of Gay Choruses in Florida!
I branched out to create/sponsor a Sunday Lesbian Brunch held monthly at the Farmington Marriott.
Old Friends - Reunited
Somewhere in the mix… I met Catherine first and then Nancy at one of the local functions.
Both lived in the same town. One was attached, the other was not.
It was a crossroads in life where I instinctively knew they should be together. I felt the current relationship was not going to last, so I secretly advised my new friend to wait out.
It’s funny that I never thought of myself as a yenta ( I’m not even Jewish! ) LOL ‘Little did I know what the future would hold!
This one act would come back to revisit me in the most delightful way!
Years passed… I’m talking about two decades and they ‘popped up on my radar’ peripherally … trying to find me on social media. Although I was everywhere, they admitted they weren’t tech savvy…. So we exchanged some messages around Christmas and my birthday in 2024.
I learned Catherine had relatives in Hilton Head , SC and wanted to visit me too! I was intrigued and a little nervous! To be honest, I didn’t recall the details of how I did the matchmaking ( which was kind of embarrassing!)
I should have remembered. But I was confident it would come up in the conversation. I wondered, how in the world do you catch up on 20 years- a lifetime?
I wanted our dinner and short time together before they headed home to Connecticut to be special. I recalled how Catherine had strong roots and close family relationship to her Italian clan. I set out to find the best place in my area… that would also accommodate my gluten free needs.
A lively hot spot in Myrtle Beach and North Myrtle Beach known as Crave… with a huge pizza oven named Agnes… was a possibility.
However, when I picked up a personal pan pizza on a Saturday night to test it out, the din of conversation and decibel level was intolerable for the three of us or anyone to hold any meaningful conversation!
After more thought and conversation with another friend, I settled on a favorite classy Italian restaurant, Travinia, known for its excellent food and jazz entertainment. It is located in Market Common ( an upscale walkable boutiquey recreation - shopping- residential area, brick walks and tree lined streets!) Ambience!
We had a fabulous dinner, with easy conversation (including the details of my former matchmaking skills). We walked around Market Common just before dusk and they drove me home, then headed back to their hotel.
It was all too brief after 20 years. But, I was content to have been able to rekindle a special friendship!I was filled with gratitude that they had made a special trip to thank me.
“If it wasn’t for you Donna, we would never have met or nearly reached 17 years together!” The most special part of all was that they had held me in their hearts for all of these years… and made the special effort to share again!
I sent them a favorite gift basket as a surprise when they returned home…
We are connecting now ~ weekly, even for short updates and hope to stay connected into the future! I feel blessed to have them as friends.
~Love recognizes no barriers~ Maya Angelou